Someone asked me if I was still close with people I went to high school with, ahhhm – No. She was shocked, partly because her long lasting friendships were birthed in High School. Truthfully, a lot of people have that experience – I’m not one of them. This is not to discount the value of anyone I went to high school (or prep school for that matter) with, it’s just that we were classmates – not friends.
My reality is just different. I come from a home of 7 children, who for the most part were taught – you have each other and that’s all you need. Additionally, I was fortunate enough to grow up simultaneously in two great neighbourhoods filled with kids and where everyone was part of the family. Seriously, we ate dinner at various houses each night. My closest friends, the ones I trust the most, call the most, e-mail the most are from these two neighbourhoods, Innswood & Gallery. They say, “Blood is thicker than water”, I say “Concrete is thicker than blood, and they are my foundation.”
I say all of that to tell you, the truths of friendship, according to me:
- Not everyone that you know and have had a conversation with is your friend.
- You can be someone’s friend, without them being yours. In other words, friendship is mutual but being a friend isn’t.
- You know you’re friends when the convenience is gone and you still choose each other.
- Not all friendships are for life, some are just for a season.
- On that note, “We used to be friends” does not mean we had a fight and are in malice, it just means life happened.
- These people are not automatically friends: Class-mate, dorm-mate, room-mate, church sister/brother, siblings, cousins, bredren, sistren, friend of a friend, parrie, Boy/girlfriends friend, co-worker, god-siblings, parent’s friends kids, neighbours, ….and the list can go on forever
- Friends are trust worthy, honest, caring towards you.
- Anyone that gossips about others with you will gossip about you with others ~ my Dad told me this early on in high school and I trust it as Gospel
- It’s not just mutual interests that make you friends, it’s a mutual positive influence on each other, a mutual desire to be together . . . .
What are your friendship truths?